{Questions, Questions}

You would be surprised {or maybe you wouldn't be} at the questions we get asked about Ryan and our choice to foster/adopt.  The comments from friends and family don't boggle us as much as the comments from acquaintances and even strangers.  I imagine that most questions and comments are made with the best intentions. 

 So here we go- top 5 most frequent comments:

5. So what's the story? Why was he taken away from his parents?
I actually understand this one. Kids in care are somewhat of an anomaly and people are just seeking to understand. BUT it's not really anyone's business to know. We don't want someone airing our dirty laundry or family secrets to others, why would we do it to our child? 

 4. So don't you guys get paid to have him? Like how much is it? I knew this one girl who knew these people who fostered 6,538 kids a month just to make money off of them, blah, blah, blah the system's broken
It's exactly NONEofYOURdamnBUSINESS a month. Yes, the state pays foster parents something called "maintenance pay". If you're really interested feel free to go to the MO department of social services website and look it all up. It's public knowledge. This question is rude and you know it.

3. What happened to his real parents?
You're talking to them.  Enough said.

 2. He looks just like you.
Really?  That's amazing.  Generally this statement comes from strangers and way more often that you would think.  Usually we just say thank you and move on.  I credit this statement to human nature.  You see a cute kid with his amazingly attractive parents (wink, wink) and you credit their amazing genes for his gorgeous eyes and smile. For people who should know better, you just sound stupid. 

 1.  So....Can you not have kids?
First, uhhhhh, rude.  Second, we are having kids.  He is just as much ours as any kid I might birth naturally.  He is absolutely not a "last resort" or "only choice".  We choose to foster and adopt, not because we can't have biological children.  We feel called to serve in this capacity. 

 {she}

Comments

  1. ReneMay 7, 2014 at 12:17 PM

    Oh my goodness. I said something to you on this list! And I'm a fellow foster parent! Sorry!

    ReplyDelete

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